Vegan Activists Encase Their Feet in Concrete to Protest Starbucks Charging More for Almond Milk

Whether they’re yelling at normal people for eating a burger, smearing menstrual blood on themselves to protest a ham sandwich, vegans are always thinking up new ways to make meaty asses of themselves.

Sometimes, it ends very badly – like being run over by a truck, getting clocked for invading a pizza joint, or getting the broccoli beaten out of them for invading a rabbit farm. The spectacle is what they are after. Stopping Joe Average from chowing down on a double pepperoni pizza is secondary to the “look-at-me” moment. What they are not doing is changing hearts and minds.

In fact, there is little chance that screaming silly slogans and interfering with businesses will motivate anyone to drop their meatball hoagie for an order of kale. I don’t know about you, but I have never considered eating just fruits, vegetables, and nuts for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. When I see vegans cuss-out meat-eaters, it does inspire me. I make sure that I have a juicy burger or steak for my next meal. Of course, I will toss on a slice of tomato with my burger, and add a side of veggies with the steak – but just the vegetables? Nah

Someone bellowing, “Animals want to live. Animals feel pain” and “It’s not food. It’s violence” isn’t going to stop me from craving and consuming some delicious meat. As I said, it’s really not about changing minds. It’s about the spectacle. Like children, vegans want their veggies raw and their attention rawer.

On Saturday, a bunch of vegan activists in Nashville decided that a Starbucks upcharge for almond milk was a crime. Oat/almond milk costs more than milk from a cow. Vegans are angry–super angry–and they are not going to take it anymore.

A bunch of them decided that the only way to get their way at Starbucks was to encase themselves in concrete. As stupid as that sounds, the visual is even funnier. The grass-eaters placed themselves in front of the entrances as roadblocks. I guess it prevented coffee drinkers from getting their caffeine fix. Eight cop cars were needed to cordon off the crime scene.

pic.twitter.com/6SGfj3ADoJ

— LJ😼 (@crotchner) August 19, 2022

I don’t get it. Either pick them up with forklifts and drop them into a pond, or just push them over like an urban cow-tip. The irony.

There’s also a high probability that these Nashville vegans are unaware of wet cement chemistry. I hope they collectively neglected to consider what elements make up blocks of concrete before they become blocks. Lime and portland cement kinda burns.

Maybe all of them are crying now in their mom’s basement. I hope it started as an itch and built into “make it stop!” pain, while they begged the cops to extricate them from their “cement overshoes.” I know it sounds mean, but I hope they exposed raw flesh to wet cement and their little piggies were bathing in wet cement before the slabs were hard as stone.

Is it mean to hope that the end result was, at a minimum, citations, and feet that look like… hamburger? Oh, the irony.

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