Ann Coulter: 2023’s First List of Openly Gay Transgender Non-white Accomplishments!
This is the only way. “So Long, 2022!” column you must read. I searched through The New York Times archives looking for the most important moments.
It turned out that 2022 marked a significant year for firsts. There were other notable events in other years, like the first flight, the first man on the moon, and the first iPhone. Let’s not forget 1969, 1970, and 2007. This past year was a treasure trove of firsts. Below are just a few of the memorable moments that the newspaper of broken record recorded.
January 5: “Adrienne Adams Makes History as First Black N.Y.C. Council Speaker.”
Boise, Idaho held a special parade to celebrate the occasion!
February 13th: Erin Jackson wins gold at the 500m. “becoming the first African American woman to win a medal” in speedskating.
If this trend continues, could the NBA see a black player?
February 27: Burna Boy “will be the first Nigerian musician to headline Madison Square Garden.”
Think about how much history we can look forward to: the first Mauritian to headline MSG, and the first Gambian headline MSG. (Unconfirmed rumors suggest that a Djiboutian may once have played cymbals in the Blue Note, but that moment is now lost to history.
March 6: Memoirist Silvia Vasquez-Lavado is “the first openly gay woman to complete the Seven Summits and the first Peruvian woman to summit Everest.”
She practiced by climbing up the remains Peru’s mass child-sacrifice — believed to be the “The” largest in the world!
March 17, 2009 “[Lia] Thomas, who competes for the University of Pennsylvania, became the first openly transgender woman to win an NCAA swimming championship.”
Thomas has proved that people born without vaginas can’t hold a candle in physical strength to people with penises. Please don’t tell us that we need to rethink girl firefighters.
March 28: “State Representative Carlos Guillermo Smith, an Orlando Democrat and [Florida’s] first openly gay Latino lawmaker …”
Ron Death-Santis has made it impossible for a sentence to be spoken in Florida. “Don’t Say ‘Gay'” A law that does not use the term “gay.”
April 20: [Announcing new editors, Marc Lacey and Carolyn Ryan]: “Ms. Ryan will be the first openly gay journalist to serve as managing editor of The Times. Mr. Lacey is the third Black journalist to serve in the role.”
Thank God that the Times has been able to rid itself of these nonentities, Donald McNeil (Bari Weiss) and James Bennet (James Bennet).
April 29: “[Maye Quade] had been seeking to become the first Black woman and first openly gay woman elected to the State Senate in Minnesota.”
The Times forgot to mention that Minnesota is home to the first member of Congress to marry her brother.
May 5, 2009 “Ms. [Karine] Jean-Pierre, who will succeed Jen Psaki, will be the first Black woman and the first openly gay person to serve in the role.”
Biden delighted his base when he appointed the first black lesbian press Secretary. She is, however, a complete moron according to tradition.
May 9: “L Morgan Lee made theater history on Monday, becoming what production officials described as the first openly transgender performer to be nominated for a Tony Award for her performance as a featured actress.”
In this instance, the Times went back to the anachronistic and misogynistic word “actress” in lieu of “actor.”
June 8: “[G]ov. Gavin Newsom played up [Rob] Bonta’s status as the first Filipino American in the role [of California’s attorney general].”
… between bites and bites of succulent roasted Pig and sips from a fine French Wine with a piquant Floral Bouquet at the French Laundry Restaurant.
July 6: “San Jose Hires a Retired Player as the N.H.L.’s First Black General Manager.”
San Jose is the best ice hockey player in the world!
July 8 “Black Woman Named President of Raiders In a First for the N.F.L.”
Well, “black” In honor of her Korean mother, she is subject to the one-drop rule.
July 8 “[Brittney Griner] … the first openly gay athlete signed to an endorsement contract by Nike.”
The first openly gay American athlete to be given precedence over a former Marine in a prisoner trade with Russia!
July 27, 2009 [New York Times Bonus Content!]: “[Kamala Harris] was a historic choice, becoming the first woman, the first African American and the first South Asian American to serve as vice president.”
She did it by being the only one in the country to meet Biden’s three requirements: 1) Must be Black; 2) Must be a Woman and 3) That’s it.
August 28th “Serbia’s prime minister, Ana Brnabic … is the first woman and first openly gay person to hold that position in the country.”
Yes, they did see what happened to gay Americans when they turned against Russia.
September 10, 2010 “[Ons Jabeur of Tunisia] could become the first African woman to win the U.S. Open.”
Jabeur lost to Iga Swaiatek, a Polish woman (BO-ring!).), who beat her in straight sets in the women’s final — but still.
September 27: Lizzo, a Black rapper, was first to play a “200-year-old crystal flute that a French craftsman and clockmaker had made for President James Madison in 1813.” It was serendipitously that she was given the flute by Carla D. Hayden. “the first African American and first woman to lead the Library of Congress.”
Because of his statues and busts, the moment was not marred by any one knowing who James Madison was.
October 2, 2009 “‘Bros,’ the first gay romantic comedy from a major studio …”
The Times emphasized this achievement and made it seem even more impressive by headinglining the article: “‘Bros’ Fails at the Box Office …” As if history matters!
November 6: Jacob Caswell was “the first nonbinary winner to earn prize money from the [New York City Marathon].”
Are there any female athletes who want to compete in the Olympics? “nonbinary” category? Let’s get back to the question about girl cops or girl firemen.
November 20: Kumail Nanjiani, actor, pointed out to The Times — as though it didn’t already! He was. “the first South Asian superhero [in a Marvel movie, ‘Eternals’].”
In other news from 2022, “”Eternals’ Leaves Theaters With 2nd-Worst Domestic Performance in MCU History.”
The November elections were a smorgasbord of firsts for Times! Take a deep breath —
“The first Black governor of Maryland, the first woman elected to the Senate from Alabama and the first openly transgender state legislator in Montana …
“The nation’s first openly-lesbian governor
“The first openly gay immigrant elected to Congress. …
“The first openly gay Black person elected into any state executive office. …
“The first transgender man elected to a state legislature. …
“The first woman to be elected to Congress and the first L.G.B.T.Q. Vermonter who was elected to Congress
“The first woman elected governor of New York. …
“The first Black woman elected to Massachusetts’s statewide executive position
“The first transgender person elected to the Minnesota Legislature …
“The first Hispanic woman elected from the state to Congress [of Illinois] …
“The first Black woman elected to Congress from [Pennsylvania] …”
Condi Rice is still waiting for the Times to notice that she was the first black female secretary-general of state.
November 12: Chris Magnus (Biden’s Customs and Border Protection Commissioner), Chris Magnus “is the first openly gay commissioner of the agency.”
Biden fired him because he tried to enforce border control.
December 5, Emma Corrin was “the first nonbinary star to appear on the cover [of Vogue].”
It is absurd that some people would like to argue that she is a nonbinary star.
December 5: Swiss writer Kim de l’Horizon “was the first nonbinary writer to win the [German Book Prize].”
I wonder if he was a nonbinary because he wrote it. “Mein Kampf” This distinction.
December 25, 2008 “Adrienne Adams is the first-ever Black [New York City] Council speaker, a majority of those serving are women and the Council has its first South Asian members.”
Wait! Aren’t these South Asians Marvel superheroes too?
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