Over $380 Million to Unemployed Preschoolers and People from the Future – DOGE Makes Mind-Blowing New Discoveries

President Donald Trump’s Department of Government Efficiency has confirmed that one’s own outrage may persist even amid unfathomable absurdities.

In other words, I had wondered if I might grow numb to the near-daily revelation of federal waste and fraud. It turns out, however, that DOGE, headed by Trump ally Elon Musk, retains its power to scandalize.

Wednesday on the social media platform X, DOGE d the results of its “initial” investigation into recent unemployment insurance claims, which showed that since 2020, nearly 38,000 people either between the ages of 1 and 5 or with birth dates listed as 2040 or beyond claimed a combined $323 million in benefits.

The specifics of the DOGE survey broke down as follows:

Musk’s department discovered that “24.5k people over 115 years old claimed $59M in benefits,” “28k people between 1 and 5 years old claimed $254M in benefits,” and “9.7k people with birth dates over 15 years in the future claimed $69M in benefits.”

“In one case,” the post concluded, “someone with a birthday in 2154 claimed $41k.”

An initial survey of Unemployment Insurance claims since 2020 revealed the following:
– 24.5k people over 115 years old claimed $59M in benefits
– 28k people between 1 and 5 years old claimed $254M in benefits
– 9.7k people with birth dates over 15 years in the future claimed…

— Department of Government Efficiency (@DOGE) April 10, 2025

Of course, those 24,500 people over 115 years old added more fraud to the equation. Combine their $59 million with the other benefits claimed, and the total fraud approaches $400 million.

But we already know about the ageless wonders who have defrauded the public. We have seen them in other DOGE investigations. Trump has talked about them at length.

The preschoolers and those from the future, however, added a new wrinkle to this maddening story of government fraud.

Incredibly, Democrats have the audacity to downplay scandals like this.

For instance, in pursuit of political advantage, and to protect their loyal base of government employees, Democrats regularly gaslight voters into believing that Trump and Musk have targeted things like “essential needs and services.”

That phrase — essential needs and services” — rings as hollow as the “mostly peaceful protests” of the Black Lives Matter era. During that ghastly period, the nationwide orgy of destruction was no mere byproduct; it was the point. But Democrats pretended otherwise.

Likewise, Democrats characterize government fraud as incidental when, in fact, it constitutes the whole point of a sprawling federal establishment. In an organization so large and corrupt, no one person or group can assume responsibility for it.

Thus, the plunder has continued for decades, resulting in an unprecedented concentration of wealth in Washington, D.C., and its suburbs.

Thankfully, Musk has pledged to look into the phenomenon of bureaucrats enriching themselves at public expense.

In short, let not the absurdity of unemployed preschoolers and time travelers diminish our outrage by one iota.

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