She Abused Him And Urged Him To Commit Suicide, Which He Did. She Probably Won’t Serve Any Jail Time.

A former Boston College student who abused her boyfriend and convinced him to commit suicide received only a two-and-a-half year suspended prison sentence, meaning she likely won’t see any jail time for her role in her boyfriend’s death.

The BBC reported that Inyoung You, 23, pleaded guilty to involuntary manslaughter in connection to her boyfriend’s suicide two years ago. Alexander Urtula, 22, committed suicide by jumping from a garage just hours before he was supposed to graduate in May 2019. You was abusive to Urtula and repeatedly urged him to commit suicide, prosecutors alleged.

Suffolk District Attorney Rachael Rollins said in October 2019 that police determined You “was physically, verbally and psychologically abusive towards Mr. Urtula during their 18-month-long tumultuous relationship.”

You originally pleaded not guilty in 2019, Buzzfeed reported, but has now pleaded guilty and accepted the suspended sentence and probation. If she violates the terms of her probation during the next 10 years, she could go to jail for two-and-a-half years. The outlet noted that her terms of probation included mental health treatment and community service. She also can’t profit from the case in any way for 10 years.

“This agreement with defense counsel was made in close consultation with the Urtula family. It is consistent with their desire to seek accountability and closure and to protect the legacy of Alexander, a loving son, brother, and uncle,” Rollins said in a statement. “They believe this is something Alexander would have wanted.”

You and Urtula started dating in late 2017 or early 2018, and by the late summer of 2018, You had become abusive, allegedly after learning Urtula lied to her about meeting with his ex-girlfriend.

Prosecutors added that You’s abuse of Urtula “became more frequent, more overwhelming, and debilitating in the days and hours leading up to Mr. Urtula’s tragic death.” They added that You’s “unrelenting abuse was witnessed by friends and classmates of both parties and documented extensively in text messages between the couple.”

Law & Crime reported that the couple exchanged more than 75,000 text messages in the two months before Urtula committed suicide, with more than 47,000 sent by You.

“Within these messages, Ms. You repeatedly told the victim that he should kill himself or die and waged a campaign of abuse that stripped the victim of his free will,” prosecutors said in a press release. “Evidence, including Mr. Urtula’s medical records, testimony of family members and friends, as well as Mr. Urtula’s own journal entries, illustrate that his suicidality began only as a result of Ms. Young’s near constant abuse.”

Rollins also cautioned people from relying on harmful stereotypes that domestic violence only involves men abusing women.

“When we think of domestic violence, we often picture a man abusing a female intimate partner.  However, we see abusers as well as victims across the gender spectrum.  Abuse occurs within every type of family constellation, not just between intimate partners, and across every religion, race, ethnicity, neighborhood and socioeconomic standing. Parents and guardians abuse children, siblings abuse each other, children abuse parents and guardians.  And not all domestic violence is physical.  There are emotional, financial, and psychological ways abuse occurs, including forced isolation, that can have a significant impact on victims. All of these things are domestic violence.” Rollins said. “Today, as always, our thoughts are with Alexander’s family and loved ones.  Today’s plea allows them to close one chapter of their grief and hopefully move on to the next stage of their journey toward healing.  My office will continue to support them and to ensure that they have access to the services and resources they may need going forward.  Our office is available to serve victims of all crime in Suffolk County – including the victims of all types of domestic violence and the survivors of homicide victims.”

If you or anyone you know is suffering from mental health issues, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is open 24 hours a day: 800-273-8255 or you can visit their website here.

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