The true crisis impacting American families.
The Decline of Family Formation in America
When asked about the most pressing problem facing American families, conservatives often point to the breakdown caused by the welfare state. While this is a valid concern, there is a larger issue looming today: a lack of family formation. Fewer Americans are choosing to get married and have children.
According to professor Jean M. Twenge’s book Generations: The Real Differences Between Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, Boomers, and Silents—and What They Mean for America’s Future, birth rates began to decline with the shift from Gen X to Millennials. Fertility rates were on the rise before the Great Recession of 2008, but they sharply dropped afterward and have yet to recover, as noted in a recent Pew report.
In a recent documentary called “Birthgap,” data scientist Stephen J. Shaw highlights that the primary reason for falling birth rates is not that mothers are having fewer children, but rather the significant increase in the number of women who remain childless. About 80% of these women wanted children but either never found a partner or did not do so in time. They were caught off guard, poorly educated about female fertility, and believed they had more time.
Part of this outlook towards biology may stem from the perception that modern society has conquered nature through technology. In a world where customization is the norm, individuals expect their every desire to be met promptly. However, it is challenging to accept that even science has limitations, as exemplified by some reactions during the pandemic.
The Changing Attitudes Towards Marriage
Young singles today often prioritize other aspects of life before dating. There is a prevailing belief that both partners should establish themselves and gain life experiences before settling down. Marriage is seen as a “capstone” rather than a ”cornerstone” of life, as sociologist Andrew J. Cherlin explains.
Furthermore, many young people come from broken homes, and divorced parents may not prioritize marriage or view it as the cornerstone of life. Only 62% of Millennials were raised by both parents, compared to higher percentages in previous generations. The broken families of one generation can lead to a lack of family formation in the next.
“The central finding of this study is that parental divorce impacts detrimentally the capacity to love and be loved within a lasting, committed relationship…In addition to overcoming their fear of failure, they have a great deal to learn about the give and take of living with another person, about how to deal with differences, and about how to resolve conflicts.”
Children of divorce may develop a pessimistic view of marriage and dismiss its importance for happiness. They lack a healthy relationship model and struggle to understand what to look for in a spouse and how to communicate effectively.
The “Boy Crisis” and its Impact
Individuals are delaying marriage and children not only due to shifting attitudes but also because many struggle to find suitable partners. This is partly attributed to the effects of the “boy crisis,” which is not limited to the United States but is observed in many developed countries.
More women are pursuing higher education than men, and they desire partners who are equally or more educated than them. For example, women are 91% more likely to show interest in men with a master’s degree on dating apps like Tinder. Additionally, Millennials are making more money than previous generations, but this increase is primarily driven by women’s incomes.
The boy crisis, as highlighted in books like “The War Against Boys: How Misguided Policies Are Harming Our Young Men” and “The Boy Crisis: Why Our Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do About It,” can be traced back to the absence of fathers. With 40% of children now born out of wedlock, boys are lagging academically, experiencing decreased lifespans and IQs, and facing higher rates of substance abuse and suicide.
This absence of fathers and the lack of family formation create a vicious cycle. The impact of fatherlessness is more severe for boys, affecting their economic future, emotional intelligence, and marital potential. Women desire mature partners and tend to marry those who are equal or above them in education and socioeconomic status. When men struggle, women are left without suitable life partners.
Under these circumstances, a hook-up culture becomes prevalent, facilitated by advancements like the birth control pill and online dating. This cycle leads to further delays in marriage as women, who are educated and financially independent, choose to pursue other opportunities rather than settling for a partner they lack confidence in.
Addressing the Decline of Family Formation
Strengthening American families requires adaptive thinking. While family policies cater to already formed families, addressing the decline in family formation requires a broader approach. It is crucial to recognize the shift in attitudes towards marriage and respond accordingly.
Responding to declining birth rates will not solely involve adjusting family-related policies like parental leave. It requires addressing underlying issues such as the boy crisis. By understanding the factors contributing to the decline of family formation, we can work towards saving the American family.
Brenda M. Hafera is the assistant director and senior policy analyst for the Simon Center for American Studies at The Heritage Foundation.
The views expressed in this piece are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.
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