Red-Pilled Right: Men shouldn’t marry, but they’re mistaken.
A Debate on the Value of Marriage
There’s a heated discussion brewing on the Right regarding the worth of marriage. Some individuals on the so-called “red-pilled” Right are now arguing that marriage is detrimental to men and they should avoid it.
Their case is not the typical liberal feminist argument that portrays men as useless and unnecessary, claiming that women don’t need men like fish don’t need bicycles. Instead, they argue that the dynamics of marriage have changed due to factors such as no-fault divorce, custody arrangements, child support payments, and spousal support.
I agree with the criticism of these policies. No-fault divorce is a disaster, and the biased child custody arrangements are a serious problem.
However, the “red-pilled” Right takes it a step further by advising young men not to get married, deeming it too risky. But that’s a foolish notion.
Pearl Davis, an anti-feminist, argues that men have no way to have children who are truly their own due to biased court decisions favoring women in custody battles. She highlights that only wealthy men have the resources to fight against this injustice.
Davis criticizes those who advocate for changing the laws and holding women accountable for failed marriages, but she also suggests that men should find a religiously devout partner and get married.
She states, “I had this thought, too, until I found a Muslim girl that did the same thing. I found a Christian girl that did the same thing; I found a Catholic girl. It’s happening all over, whether you want to believe it or not, it is happening. I don’t care about your religion. I don’t care about your church. This happens everywhere.”
Her argument against these marital policies is valid. Nobody is dismissing the pain experienced by men who have been unjustly victimized in these circumstances where the system is stacked against them. That is undeniably true.
However, the benefits of marriage are still extraordinary. It does matter who you marry. To claim that there is no difference in the character of the person you marry is simply untrue. The person you choose as your spouse can significantly mitigate the risk of divorce.
Throwing away the entire institution of marriage is not the solution. Instead, we should revise the laws while encouraging men to find a suitable partner and marry them.
If that requires moving away from state-mandated laws and towards contractual arrangements, so be it. I agree with many of the criticisms of current marriage laws. The problem arises when we suggest that men should avoid marriage altogether, as it leads to unintended consequences where unmarried men become a threat to society.
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The reality is that men channel their aggressive drives towards either constructive or destructive endeavors. The Left desires a society where both men and women remain unmarried. By accepting this, we undermine the very foundation of society that allows for growth and progress beyond leftist principles.
Marriage is undoubtedly a risk, and currently, men bear a disproportionate share of that risk. However, is the reward worth the risk?
In the vast majority of cases where both individuals are committed and share common values, the answer is a resounding yes.
With the red pill movement, the diagnosis often hits the mark, but the proposed solution misses it.
Interestingly, there is actually a formula for a successful marriage. It involves being conservative, religious, and highly educated. Seventy-seven percent of college-educated conservative parents are still in their first marriage.
In the community where I reside, an Orthodox Jewish community, divorce rates are remarkably low. Why? Because everyone is deeply committed to their religious beliefs, viewing marriage as a sacred bond that truly matters. Additionally, people don’t date solely for physical pleasure; they date with the intention of building a future together and having children.
Marriage is undoubtedly a risk, but is it merely a flip of a coin?
No, it’s a decision that requires careful consideration. What kind of person do you want to date? What kind of relationship do you want to build? How seriously do you take the commitment?
Do the laws need to change?
Absolutely.
Should men get married?
Absolutely.
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What actions can society take to promote healthy and equitable relationships and encourage young individuals to enter into meaningful marriages
H, stability, and the raising of future generations.
Marriage provides a framework for individuals to form deep emotional connections, build families, and contribute to the betterment of society as a whole. Numerous studies have shown that married individuals tend to be happier, healthier, and more financially stable than their unmarried counterparts. They also exhibit lower rates of substance abuse and criminal behavior.
In addition, marriage provides a stable environment for children to thrive and grow. Research consistently shows that children raised in a two-parent household fare better academically, emotionally, and socially compared to those raised in single-parent or unstable family environments. Marriage encourages parental commitment, shared responsibilities, and provides children with a sense of security and stability that is crucial for their development.
It is undeniable that marriage has faced challenges in recent decades. No-fault divorce and biased custody arrangements have created situations that are unfair and detrimental to some individuals, particularly men. However, the solution lies in reforming these policies and addressing the underlying issues, not abandoning the institution of marriage altogether.
Rather than advising men to avoid marriage, society should promote healthy and equitable relationships. This includes advocating for changes in the legal system to ensure fairness in divorce and custody proceedings. It is also essential to educate both men and women about the responsibilities and challenges that come with marriage, as well as the importance of mutual respect and communication in maintaining a successful partnership.
Furthermore, instead of perpetuating a narrative that vilifies marriage, we should emphasize the benefits and values it brings to individuals and society. Encouraging young men to seek compatible partners and enter into meaningful marriages can provide them with emotional support, companionship, and a sense of purpose.
In conclusion, while there are legitimate criticisms of certain aspects of marriage, it is crucial to recognize the immense value that marriage holds for individuals and society as a whole. Rather than dismissing it as too risky or outdated, efforts should be directed towards reforming laws and promoting healthy, equitable relationships. By doing so, we can harness the power of marriage to foster personal happiness, family stability, and societal progress.
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