The bongino report

“Your Place or Mine” – Romcom Via ChatGPT

What if you had all the elements of a good rom-com but left out the most important one?

Heart.

You may have “Your Place or Mine,” a movie that seems perfect for a cozy, date-night style selection … until you’re 10 minutes into the story.

You’ll know something is off-kilter from the jump. And things, sadly, don’t get better from there.

Reese Witherspoon and Ashton Kutcher play Debbie and Peter, singletons who hooked up once 20 years ago and decided they’re better off as friends.

Why?

Because it’s written in the script. Stop asking dumb questions!

They chat and zoom from their separate coastal homes, while living out their movie-like lives. She’s an overprotective L.A. mum who makes all the safe choices for her family. He’s a Big Apple-based consultant who knows how to rebrand his clients.

They swap coasts as Debbie is offered a college spot in New York. Peter leaves  for Los Angeles, where he must care for Debbie’s son (Wesley Kimmel, Jimmy’s nephew).

These seemingly-unlovable lovers may still feel for one another after all these years. Events in the film may even reignite their passions.

Get … out!

Rom-coms are supposed to be predictable. Problem with “Your Place or Mine” It begins with the film’s artificial, suffocating feel. It feels like the film is running at an inappropriate speed, or that Aline Brosh McKenna, the first-time director of the film, is in far too much control.

Even old pros like Witherspoon and Kutcher can’t bring life to their characters.

The situation gets worse when the sidekicks from rom-coms join the fray. Tig Notaro’s droll line readings can be a hoot, but she’s given nothing to work with as the sassy confidante for both Debbie and Peter.

Steve Zahn is so good at everything (especially). “The White Lotus”) is embarrassing as Debbie’s neighbor, whose gardening obsession isn’t remotely funny.

It has never happened before.

Nor is hearing Peter try out a litany of nicknames for Debbie’s son. “Your Place or Mine” It is filled with flat running gags.

The film’s saving grace? Zoe Chao plays Peter’s ex-flame who mysteriously bonds with Debbie during her NYC jaunt. Chao flips the script on its head, creating smiles in places where none should be.

Otherwise, we’re left with head-scratching plot details, a love interest for Debbie (Jesse Williams) who doesn’t make much sense and a third-act development meant to split the couple in question that’s resolved in a blink.

If you’re gonna trace the Rom-Com Handbook, at least pretend you’re giving it your all.

HiT or Miss: “Your Place or Mine” It wastes a cute couple and a frisky premise, hoping that the rom-com genre will soon cease to exist.


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